How To Overcome Anger
How to overcome anger. 29th November 2012. Written by Manashantii
Anger is negative judgement and the need to blame. Blame stops you from loving and forgiving the person you are angry with. Blame stops you from living in the present moment. When you blame it stops you from healing emotionally and Spiritually. Anger steals your joy, love and inner peace. It is important to eventually come out of the cycle of hate, blame, punish and judgement. Anger makes the receiver feel defensive and or guilty.
There are times when anger is appropriate and a valid form of self-defense. It is important to be angry at the right time, the right place, with the right person. Frustration is anger plus the belief that you can’t do anything about your situation.
(Frustration = Anger + Apathy+ Inertia = Frustration)
Bitterness causes heartache and pain.
Anger is hurt, pain, blame and negative judgement. Anger is hurt, pain and belief that injustice has occurred. Hurt pride and feelings of self centred selfishness can cause anger. Anger is usually an act of defensiveness. Anger makes people on the receiving end feel attacked. Anger requires that you blame others. Anger can also mean that you feel the need to control others or a situation let go off your desire to control the situation.
When I am angry I give up being responsible. When I am angry, because I am blaming someone I am also seeing myself as a victim. I understand that my thoughts follows my feelings. My thoughts creates how I emotionally feel. Anger stagnates my emotional and Spiritual growth, anger blocks my communication with God.
Judging, comparing and competing generates jealous and envy feelings. Affirm the following statements and own the words. I believe that I am lovable and I am valued. I give up valuing myself on the condition that I achieve things, achieve status and material gain. I am worthwhile and no status, material things or person can change my self value. I love myself unconditionally.
When I feel hurt and pain I will speak about how I feel, I will face the pain and hurt I feel rather than be angry. Expressing hurt and pain helps me to heal. My anger distances me from people. I tune into my hurt and pain feelings rather than block my feelings of pain with food, drugs or alcohol.
I learn to comfort and pamper myself when I feel hurt. The vital part of self-esteem building is self-parenting. Being grown up is being able to emotionally parent myself. I respond positively and I avoid negatively reacting to situations. I respond with love, I am responsible and I forgive.
When I feel angry I will practise the emotional ABC’s.
A is Allow Airway for your emotions.
B is Be with the emotion and Breathe and emotionally observe.
C is Channel the emotion Creatively Constructively and Cathartically.
Anger is a normal and natural reaction to threat. Anger tells us when we are experiencing Threats. The three threats that ignite Anger are:-
Threats to Self Esteem and Self Worth
Threats to Fairness
Threats to Ego
Negative Reactions. Avoid the following it makes you and others more angry:-
Demanding and Whining
Judging and Blaming
Please read these Bible verses:-
Ephesians 4 v 31-32 King James Version = Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: v32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.
Hebrews 12v 15 New Living Translation. Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.
Job 5v2 New Living Translation = Surely resentment destroys the fool and jealousy kills the simple.
Proverbs 15v1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 14v29, Proverbs 16v32, Proverbs 25 v28,
Proverbs 21v24, Proverbs 19 v19a Proverbs 25v8, Matthew 5v22a, Romans 12v19, James 4v1, 2 Corinthians 10v3,
1 Corinthians 13v4 and v5, James 3v 14- v18, Philippians 2 v14 and v15,
Proverbs 10 v12, Proverbs 3 v30, Romans 14 v19, Ephesians 4v2, 1 Peter 3v4, Peter 5 v5, James 1 v19-v20, Psalm 37v8 and Ecclesiastes 7v9